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Most people dream of settling down with a life partner and enjoying a long-lasting relationship. Too often, though, relationships and marriages fall apart. The longer a relationship, the more complex they tend to be. Whether you’ve been with someone for two years or two decades, it’s important to be on the lookout for relationship red flags. While these aren’t always indicators that a breakup is on the horizon, they may be signs that you could benefit from a few sessions of couples therapy.
Communication – or lack thereof – is frequently cited as one of the leading causes for break-ups and divorces. Dr. John Gottman of the University of Washington found that the greatest indicator of divorce is whether one or both partners show contempt during marriage. Instead of admiring their spouse, contempt is conveyed through sarcasm, accusations, and negative judgment. Such contemptuous talk is a fast track to the erosion of safety and well-being in a relationship.
Couples often focus less on physical attraction and common interests over time. When a person starts to focus on “what I want” over “what we want,” the fallout can be significant. If you prioritize your marriage while your spouse’s career takes precedence in their life, conflict may be inevitable. It’s normal for people to grow and change throughout the course of a relationship, but if growth is aligned, divorce may be on the horizon.
The way we earn, spend, and save money has a direct impact on our relationships. That’s especially true when money is tight. How you support yourselves should be a topic of serious discussion as your relationship evolves. The goal is to never feel exploited or used, but too often, one spouse adopts a “saver” mentality while the other takes a “spender” mindset. Aligning on finances is a challenge, but not an insurmountable one.
Schedule a Couples Therapy Session Today
Even the healthiest of relationships experience growing pains now and then. If your partnership is causing more stress than happiness, though, it may be time to schedule a couples therapy session. Acknowledging the challenges you’re facing together is often half the battle – get the wheels in motion today and you’re certain to benefit in the long run.